1:48AM on October 10, 2008
Today i want to write about punishment in the D/s relationship...
There are many forms of punishment, but the reasons for punishment remain about the same...Not obeying the Dominant.
Punishment has many forms, from physical pain to that of the psyche. Punishment is used to teach the slave/submissive and to help him/her to grow. It is based on the same general concept as when you are teaching a child...if a child does something wrong you would find a way to teach them not to do it again, help them learn that it is wrong and that the rules must be followed or there are consequences. It is the same for a slave/submissive, when something is done that is not supposed to be, one of the rules is broken, disobeying the Dominant, or out right disrespect, a punishment needs to be set. Ultimately the goal is to show the slave/submissive that he/she must follow the Dominants orders/rules, and when this is not the case then there is a consequence and that threw it all the Dominant will still remain with them. The main point of any punishment is to teach the slave/submissive a lesson, but in doing so the Dominant usually instills a sense of love and caring from Him/Her to the slave/submissive. The fact that the Dominant is willing to teach the slave/submissive instead of just letting them go, it shows the slave/submissive that the Dominant will still be there to help guide them.
Punishment is part of helping a slave/submissive grow and understand that there is a reason behind the Dominants order, that the Dominant is there to help you in your process and that punishment can help you release the negative. Meaning you can use it as a release to let go of the wrong doing and move on.
Here is aan example of just one of my punishments ..
A few days ago i was told to do something by my Master, when i did not i had to engage in the consequences. Those being that i was ordered to take clothes pins and attach them to my nipples and my pussy lips, i also was informed by Master that i would have to remove my collar as i was not fit to wear it at that time.
The clothes pins were of course painful, but ultimately it was the thought of having to go without my collar that bothered me, knowing that i had disappointed Master to that degree made me sick. So sick in fact that i got dizzy and felt as if i was going to pass out. Although the pain was there and i was able to remove the pins, i still had the mental anguish of knowing i had not fulfilled my obligation to my Master, that in itself is what was making me sick. Crying and being upset, to the point of making myself vomit because of being disgusted with my own actions, and not finishing my tasks.
It is the mental state i put myself in that bothers me the most, when i can not please my Master i take things to heart very easily, i run things threw in my head over and over again until i am able to process what i have done and how i can fix it for the next time. Even though i received a "pain" punishment, which is still with me in my mind, the knowledge of the feeling of the pain, it is the thoughts that i run threw my mind that will finally let me be able to make my judgments better and be able to take my true place and wear my collar once again.
Without my collar i am lost, alone and forgotten in my mind. Without the feel of my Master's collar around my neck, the knowledge that He has proclaimed me as His own, i feel worthless. Knowing that i sent my Master to that place, putting Him in a position where He felt that removing my collar was necessary that is what it is that made me sick. Without my collar, well, without my Master, it is a dark and desolate place for me to be. A place that i know i do not want to return to and a memory that i will hold forever, which in turn will insure that i will make sure that i will be able to fulfill my obligation, my orders from this point on.
You can only be you once you have set yourself free!